Porn is an effective way to add some spice and tension into the bedroom environment, providing an opportunity to discuss any kinks safely and comfortably.
„Watching others enjoy sexual pleasure can be extremely enjoyable, almost like drinking,” according to sex therapist Sharon Hartman. Here are some strategies for making it even hotter: 1. Allow her to select the video.
1. Start with a sexy video
Watching porn can add spice and excitement to your sexual relationship, but broaching the subject with your girlfriend may seem intimidating. There are various approaches you can take to get her interested in watching it alongside you.
Start off by getting her consent before showing any videos to her. Otherwise, she could become uncomfortable and might not want to watch porn at all! When discussing it together in a positive or neutral environment, explain your desire to add some kinky excitement into her bedroom and that porn can help expand upon new positions and fantasies.
Watch non-visual porn, such as written erotica or audio erotica. These forms of media provide you with a safe space to discuss sexy themes and fantasies without directly looking at specific bodies. When watching, interact with your partner by touching them or telling them what appeals to you about the video – all this helps your relationship thrive and build trust!
Suggest to your partner the idea of pornography by showing her a video of you two having sex together – this will show them just how enjoyable and thrilling it can be, while showing that they do not fear trying anything sexy in bed!
Once she feels secure with herself and comfortable watching videos, you can expand to other videos. Allow her to choose what she would like to watch – this will make her more engaged in the process and likely to stick with it! As more time passes by watching these videos together, more she’ll experiment in bed and will become excited about your sex life.
2. Let her pick the video
Many people have mixed opinions regarding pornography. Some consider it to be cheating, leading to sexual dissatisfaction; while others see it as an avenue to explore their desires and sexuality. Before trying to introduce pornography into your relationship, it is wise to have discussions regarding sex and desire with both partners in order to ascertain if she accepts the idea or not.
As part of your dialogue about watching porn together, it is also essential to discuss which types of material will be shown. For instance, if she is particularly sensitive to violence, you may not wish to show videos featuring slapping or choking as this could turn her off and not produce the positive outcomes intended.
Your discussions should also cover her sexual fetishes. For instance, if she’s especially fond of gravity-defying positions, you may want to find some videos featuring this form of kink – it will get her more excited about watching porn together, and will increase the odds that she is willing to try new things in bed with you!
Once you have discussed her sex fetishes with her, let her choose the video that she wants to watch together with you. This will give her confidence that you are aware of her preferences without being judgmental – plus it shows you are open to trying different things in bed together!
Keep the focus of your time together on pleasure and intimacy. Avoid viewing pornography as a tool for sexual gratification; rather use it as an avenue for romance between you. Doing this will allow you to enjoy its benefits without placing undue strain on its contents, providing another means for bonding with your girlfriend through its sexy aspects.
3. Make it a date
Couples unfamiliar with porn may benefit from exploring alternative erotic media such as written or audio erotica to explore sexual fantasies without having to see other people’s bodies, which often makes discussing sexual fantasies easier and feels more intimate. If your girlfriend has some hesitation about watching porn, it would be wise to begin by exploring non-visual formats first and progress onto porn if that proves fruitful for both of you.
After discovering what she wants to see, suggest watching porn together during a calm and peaceful moment when both of you have time to discuss it together. This will make her more open to the idea and less likely to feel pressured by you into it.
Porn is an invaluable opportunity to discuss each other’s sexual interests and learn something from one another. For instance, if your girlfriend finds certain acts or positions to be particularly appealing, use it as an opportunity to discuss ways you might try them in bed together.
If possible, suggest watching porn on a laptop instead of your phones if possible; this will enable both of you to hold onto the screen at once while keeping hands free if either of you get inspired by something on screen. It can be an ideal way to explore intimacy as a couple and create an exciting date night – the more often you watch porn together, the greater its benefits will be to your relationship; always ensure you check-in during and after watching to adjust as necessary.
4. Make it sexy
Once you feel confident enough to discuss porn with your girlfriend, you might wish to use certain techniques in order to make the conversation more sexy and open her up to watching more; additionally, this will add an extra spark before bedtime!
Avoid telling her mid-hookup that you plan to watch porn. This could make her uncomfortable and is certainly something to avoid!
Wait until she’s been seducing you and is in an extremely sexual mood before broaching the topic of porn. At that time, she should be both excited and open-minded towards it.
If she seems uncertain about joining you for watching porn for fun, be sure to reassure her that it won’t affect how she views you or affect your relationship. Create rules for the session – such as certain acts or positions turning you on while others don’t; use this time as an opportunity to address any sexual fantasies or fetishes that arise while watching videos, says Burns.
Once you’ve settled on the rules for watching porn together, start watching! Start off slow–such as with masturbation clips–then gradually increase intensity as you watch. Make sure to interact as you watch; touching and looking are powerful aphrodisiacs! Feel free to suggest trying any new positions or fetishes that might pop up while watching the videos; just make sure that before, during, and after porn viewing both partners feel seductive!
5. Don’t use it every single time
Making use of pornography as an aid to start things off in the bedroom is ideal, but it should not become your primary means of stimulation. Too much porn can become tiresome or become used as an excuse rather than turning her on; try engaging in other sexual activities together and make it clear that porn is just a tool to help both of you have fun in bed.
If your girlfriend prefers not to watch porn together with you, respect her decision. They may find it more exciting exploring sexuality on their own; or may have other valid reasons why they do not wish to watch. Therefore it’s vital that this topic be broached early and be sure to listen and acknowledge any concerns from both partners involved.
Many couples never address this subject, which can cause hurt feelings between partners. This is particularly the case when one partner is secretly viewing porn without informing their other, leading to lack of trust between partners, which in some instances may even constitute cheating.
If you want to watch porn with your girlfriend, a laptop would be best. Not only will this make the experience easier and more intimate; additionally, laptops can be much more sexy in bed than mobile devices; you could play romantic music while watching porn, which will create the desired ambiance and bring you and her closer together. Furthermore, some laptops even feature seductive themes on their screens which add an extra sexy element!